“To forgive is a balm for the soul. To understand there is nothing to forgive is the cure for all suffering.”

I posted that on Twitter today and got a number of private messages as a result.

Most of them were angry.

People don’t want to entertain the idea that there might be “nothing to forgive”. They are hurting, and there’s a reason why!

Well, of course there’s a reason.

And even if the reason is the actions of others, there’s something else at work here:

Our interpretation of what’s going on.

If you’ve ever been under the mercy of someone else’s power – physically, emotionally, financially, etc. – then you know how constrained you can feel. How frightened. How small.

But if you’ve ever stood up and left that situation – gotten out of it by your own efforts – then you know an extremely important thing:

To change the situation, you had to change yourself first.

You have to find a place inside you that is infinitely stronger than the forces trying to keep you down.

Some people never find that.

Sadly, it usually isn’t their fault. Tools are taught and shared, and to discover them alone is difficult…almost impossible.

And if you never find the tools to rise, you never learn to forgive because forgiveness is one of the essential tools for true freedom.

In fact, when you learn to forgive you find that your heart opens to the knowledge that there is never anyone to truly blame. We are all responsible for the state of the world.

You can blame the human race but that will get you nowhere fast. You might as well blame the very concept of life for your personal suffering.

And when you get on that path, things can get very dark indeed.

Everyone has been born into a flawed world full of fear and emptiness.

But we’ve also been born into a world of incredible kindness and love. We are surrounded by it on a constant basis.

But there are those who are lost or who have a piece of them missing, who are not cared for by the society we find ourselves in.

Do we blame society, then?


Again, there is no one to blame.

There is only forgiveness.

And beyond forgiveness is acceptance.

Acceptance that we are on a path together. Acceptance that things must improve for the sake of those yet to be born. Acceptance that all suffering, and all victories in this world, have lead directly to you, me and everyone we know.

Our job, if we ever had one, is to make things better.

To create bonds of love and community. To reach out, to be vulnerable. To be so vulnerable we are an unbreakable strength.

There is no one to forgive because there is no one to blame.

There are only fallow fields to seed, empty voids to bring into creation, limitless possibilities to foster, nurture and allow.

This is pretty heady stuff, I know, but it’s also the most practical way there is to move into a better world.

Forgiveness releases the poison of our souls. To go beyond forgiveness releases the potential of our souls.

There is a place you can journey to in your heart of hearts: that realm between wakefulness and dreams. In that place there is no good or bad, no darkness or light. It’s a place where all opposites come together.

The universe is not divided.

The universe is complete, whole and beautiful.

Did you feel that tremor in your soul?

That’s the voice of truth.

Others have said it better:

Uni – One

Verse – Song

Right and wrong are ways we follow to understand how to live more fully. They are guideposts along the road. And yes, there is darkness and light, and we do choose.

But once you choose light enough you see that darkness never actually existed.

It was just emptiness waiting for the light.

Go beyond your concern for those who wield power over you. Because they don’t. They wield power over shadows, which in the end are nothing.

You are light.

You have all the power at your disposal that ever was.

As long as you love abundantly, fearlessly and with absolute, carefree abandon and joy, you will use that power to brighten the lives of others, to help all of humanity on our way together.

This is my prayer.

Hiy hiy.


5 Replies to “Forgiveness”

  1. To attempt to explain the need for personal responsibility in healing is very difficult. Often people will confuse responsibility for getting out of or over a problem with responsibility for getting into it.

    With such a confusion comes much anger.

  2. I saw your tweet yesterday, Aaron, and it resonated with me. When I read “To understand there is nothing to forgive”, I recognized it in the broad sense that you just wrote about. We are all in this life together; we all have things to work on. I felt a sense of release in realizing that with nothing to forgive, I can let everything go and the others can work on their own lives. With nothing to forgive, I don’t have to try to forgive. I can just let it go and move on.

    That being said, I know too well how tightly we hold onto the idea that we cannot forgive the other. I think it feels like a protection to us, and there are times in our lives when it is the only way to cope, the only way to keep ourselves separate from the other and try to help ourselves.

    We need to reach out to each other in love and support until more of us feel safe in ourselves. Maybe when we feel less alone, more connected, it will be easier to let go of blame and (un)forgiveness.

  3. I love Aaron Paquette’s paintings. Didn’t realize that he is such a powerful writer as well. This article certainly stretches the brain.

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