Ten crazy secrets you WON’T believe (especially number 7!)
1. Understand that she is not here to please you. Any woman worth pursuing is ALREADY following her own dreams, her own path, and if you’re worthy, you can walk beside her. But you better have your own goals that you are following or you’ll get dropped like dead weight. No one wants to drag you along. A good woman wants you to walk boldly beside her.
2. A man worth having in a woman’s life has some basic skills: cooking, cleaning, proper hygiene, a strong work ethic and he understands the art of conversation. Basically, all the things that would make you independent and show that you know how to be a self-sufficient man. Learn how money works and become financially responsible. Gain an undeniably powerful presence by becoming powerfully present in your interactions with others. Pay attention when people are speaking. That’s the hallmark of a true leader.
3. You must know how to properly protect a woman and make her feel safe. That means respecting her own independence, respecting her strength and power, and adding your own. It does not mean that you get to be condescending, pushy or controlling. THOSE traits just expose you as the insecure mess you’ve allowed yourself to become.
4. Read, write and think. The most desirable women in the world are smart. They deserve a man who at least tries to be as smart as they are. They deserve a man who is interesting, thoughtful, and understands and respects the power of emotions. Become well spoken and learn to command a room with your presence, not in an obnoxious way, but because you know the secret power of intentional service to others. A man who can recite some poetry beyond ‘roses are red, violets are blue’ is suddenly a man worth noticing. Creativity is a trait that will massively benefit EVERY aspect of your life.
5. Treat your body well. You’ll have to if you want to keep up with a vibrant, energetic and active woman. Eat well, get some exercise, and wear clothes that fit (and hopefully match). Be drug-free and booze-free. She’s going to be taking care of herself, at least try to match her commitment. And remember, she’s someone’s sister, someone’s daughter. They’ll want to know she is with a person who doesn’t skip leg day.
6. Respect that no means no. Maybe in the past, it was hard to understand the signals, but in today’s world a woman isn’t going to play games. If she says no, it does not mean, ‘try harder’. No one is playing hard to get. Access to a woman’s body is not your right, it’s a privilege. Her body is a temple. This is something you were not taught by society. Until now. And now that you know, always respect that knowledge. Hormones and desires will run strong. Be stronger.
7. Having said that, be proud and comfortable with your sexuality. It’s one of our dominant traits: to be sexual, sensual beings. There’s nothing wrong with it. So stand tall, stand strong. Move with power, grace and confidence. Don’t hunch over, don’t hide yourself. You are a magnificent beast, in full control of your procreative power. Reign it in a little so you’re not weirding everyone out, but relax into the fact that one of your biological purposes is to be a desirable being and ultimately a father.
8. Learn to be a GOOD father. Many of us were abandoned by our fathers, or didn’t have the best example growing up. Don’t use that as an excuse. Use it as your launching pad. Get the best information you can. Ask good dads for their thoughts. Find out what makes a man great and incorporate that into who YOU are. Deal with your issues not by burying them, but shining light on them, allowing them to heal. Be prepared for the day when you will have your own child, or be an uncle to kids who need an amazing example of responsible, gentle, unwavering masculinity.
9. Become excellent in at least one skill. Then another, and another. Whatever you do, be the best damned THAT in the world. Strive for extraordinary accomplishment and never be satisfied with mediocrity. You are a man, an apex predator with the wolf, the lion, the eagle and the mountain bear as your brothers. Be aware, alert, and supremely present in your life, and never be satisfied with second best. Be gracious in your losses, but not satisfied. The world needs men who are willing to get back up, practice like it’s real, and never back down from excellence.
10. To get the most desirable woman in the world, then, all you have to do is become the most desirable man in the world. And it’s easier than you think. There’s a place out there called the second mile, and it’s way less crowded. If you can commit to yourself; your development; your victories; to making your life meaningful…if you can commit to serving your people, your community, and the world, then you will be a real man. And it’s real men this world needs.
A little tongue-in-cheek to start with. I was asked to write something for young men (the savvy reader will figure out that this is easily tweaked to apply to everyone, regardless of gender). You are free to print it out if you think it will help you. There has never been a greater need for true warriors.
A warrior knows how to serve, how to listen, how to care for others and themselves. A warrior speaks their truth and acts from a place of integrity. A warrior protects life. The last resort for a warrior is violence. It means all else has been tried and all else has failed.
Keep your mind, your heart and your body ready. Develop a deep and honourable connection to the sacred. Respect all women, even those who don’t respect you. And serve the children and the elders with all your heart.
Don’t succumb to the peer pressure of those who would reduce you. Instead become the peer pressure that forces everyone to raise their own standards, their own efforts, just to try to match you. A warrior has one life to give and so he gives it his all.
– Aaron Paquette
PS. what are your tips?? Feel free to share in the comments below!
Aaron Paquette is a First Nations Metis artist, author and speaker. Based in Edmonton, Aberta, his Bestselling Novel ‘Lightfinder’ was published 2014 through Kegedonce Press and is now in 2nd printing.
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